


Last Words

by Deiro



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Angst, Blood Loss, Gen, Major Character Injury, Middle School, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-12
Updated: 2015-06-12
Packaged: 2018-04-04 02:40:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4122868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deiro/pseuds/Deiro
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your friend is bleeding to death. Bleeding and bleeding. And there’s nothing you can do about it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Last Words

**Author's Note:**

> What if Izaya really had to watch Shinra die after that stabbing incident in Middle School? That's what prompted me to write this. I also kind of had that "Izaya City" game he made in high school from that NicoNico special in mind.

_Did you know _…_? It takes about two and a half litters of blood for the average person to die _…_ It’d be a miracle if they make it after that, haha._

“Shouldn’t you not be talking?” Izaya says.

 _Ahh,_ _judging from this wound _…_ I don’t think I can spill out 2 ½ litters from just this _ _…__ Unless I misjudged and it pierced my abdominal cavity? __…__ ahahah. I think I'll be fine.  
_

-your friend is bleeding to death. bleeding and bleeding. his lab coat drenched in red-  
-your hands tremble as you apply pressure to stop the bleeding-  
-it just keeps flowing-

_I-it’s okay. I’m sure help will come. Well _…_ even if it doesn’t, it’s fine by me._

-your friend is bleeding out on the floor. nothing is okay. your heart is elevated. his skin is getting paler. blood continues to seep out-

“How can you still be smiling?”

_Ahaha, I wonder…? I keep picturing my loved one smiling… uwaaaa!_

-your friend is bleeding on the floor. it will take 2 ½ litters of blood until he dies out-  
-the death is slow. it must be painful-  
-his bandaging wasn't enough-  
-there’s nothing you can do-

“She isn’t even here to see you _…_ ”

_She will come _…_ Ahahah. I know this may be difficult…for you… to grasp…_

-your friend is bleeding, bleeding, and bleeding, he can barely make out words-

_You see, She's like… like _…_ a dullahan._

“A what?”

_She is a dullahan. She is like… umm… death, I suppose. She is lady death, She is…_

-your friend is bleeding on the floor and getting weaker by the second. he’s spouting nonsense, he is-

_I love her… I love…_

Izaya feels the insides of his stomach churn.

_Even if she can’t see me right now, I’m thinking of her… I’m sure… somehow…_

“How can you be so hopeful? Does she even return your feelings?”

-your friend is bleeding on the floor. there is nothing you can do. and yet, you feel bitter. and it’s not just because it’s your fault-

_She is amazingly kind _…_ she is… I’m sure… ahhh, maybe _…_? Ooowww._

“You shouldn’t be talking.”

-and yet he’s smiling. smiling. smiling. bleeding on the floor and smiling-

_I-i's_ _okay! Maybe I’ll meet her in _…_ death? Well, I’m not sure _…_ but _ _…__  
_

-your friend is bleeding on the floor. and all you can do is twist and turn in jealousy-

 _Ssince_ _she lost her memories, ahahah _…_ so perhaps it won't _…_ I’m not sure. Ahhh… at least, I _…__

-your friend is bleeding on the floor and spouting nonsense. and spouting--

 _At_ _least _…_ I got to… Meet her and…_

Shinra's eyes are glowing.  
Even through the damp irises, they are glowing.

-your stomach turns and twists into jealousy-

“Don’t you regret this? You won’t see her again if you die.”

-and it’s all your fault, all your fault, and you can do nothing nothing nothing but pathetically watch him bleed out-

 _Not_ __…_ really?_

Shinra’s eyes are getting sleepy.

 _Ahhh, I'm thinking I guess_ _… I _…_ I should…_

-your friend is bleeding on the floor. you feel sick. you are useless. helpless and useless-

 _ _…_ If_ _you happen to see her…_

“You shouldn’t be talking.” Izaya's hands are shaking.

_But if you happen to… ahhh _…_ P-please tell her…_

-your friend is bleeding on the floor, stuttering and getting weak, and you don’t know if you can even make his last wish come true-

_T-tell her I did this _…_ I did thi… for her _…_ for… she…_

-your friend is bleeding on the floor, and it’s all your fault, but he didn’t do it for you-

“I should’ve been the one stabbed.”

 _Ahaha_ _… what could’ve _…_? You could've done…? It’d be you laying on the floor, ahahah._

-he’s spouting nonsense and he’s in pain, but he’s smiling-

_I would’ve… perhaps? I wanted… to save youuu…_

-your friend is bleeding on the floor and it’s all your fault, and he saved your ass, but he didn’t do it for you-

“Why are you still smiling?” It makes Izaya sick, sick, sick, sick.

_Its love! Oowww _…_ You have to face death with… love… y-you have to _…__

-your friend is bleeding on the floor. and he’s smiling. as he faces death, he is smiling-

“Don’t you feel any pain?”

_Of course? I-it’s not _…_ I’m not _…_ immune… Hahhh…!_

how how how how how how how howh owhow

“D-don’t… Shinra!”

-your friend is bleeding on the floor. he’s bleeding to death. he is dying and there’s nothing you can do-  
-nothing you can do-  
-as he faces death, he is smiling. but you blame yourself. it’s your fault-

“Shinra…”

_…It’s… okay… I knew there wass…a scchanc…e…_

“Shinra, don’t go!”

-as your friend lies on the floor, bleeding to death, thanks to a blow that was supposed to be for you-  
-as your friend bleeds to death-

“Shinra! Sstay with me! You can’t--!!”

-as your friend bleeds to death, the one who chokes on his own words is you-

Shinra is smiling as he sights.

_T-tell her… I love…_

-as your friend bleeds to death, in front of you, the one he thinks of isn’t you-

“T-they should be here soon! Shinraaa!”

_Tell her… ssssCelty…_

-as your friend bleeds to death-

_SssCelty… I won’t… will I see you…_

Shinra sighs while smiling.

“…”

-the one he thinks of isn’t you-

Shinra weakly lifts his hand and looks towards the ceiling.

_Black _…_ is… my favorite color…_

“…”

_I’ll hold on to you _…_ even in death _…__

-the one he thinks of isn’t you-

_It’s okay, really… I hope you think of me… well…_

“…”

_I love you._

“…”

Shinra takes one last look at Izaya and he smiles.  
Shinra exhales one last time. His eyes close but he smiles.  
He is smiling even now. Even as blood continues to flow down, even as his chest stills, even as his skin turns a different hue.

-your friend is bleeding and smiling bleeding and smiling bleeding and smiling-

“…”

-bleeding and smiling bleeding and smiling bleeding and smiling-  
-until the act of bleeding and smiling becomes his symbol-

“…”

-this symbol will haunt you-  
-you can't blame anyone but yourself-  
-why did you allow yourself to be so careless?-  
-you were the reason he lost everything-

Shinra isn’t speaking.

-your guilt will become your past and your past will become your god-

“…”

Shinra is still smiling. And the one he thinks of isn’t you.

-you are dead-  
-you have died-  
-you are no more-


End file.
